25 Reasons NOT to Visit Krakow
If this post will not discourage you, I don't know what will!
Are you thinking of visiting Krakow?
Think twice! It’s not what you think it is!
I listed all the reasons NOT to visit Krakow. I hope it will make you rethink your decision.
There are thousands of articles convincing you that Krakow is the most stunning and fun city ever.
Right?
You’ve probably read a couple of them. But what you don’t’ know is the dark side of Krakow.
But don’t worry – it’s not too late to learn it. I have listed all the worst features of Krakow, so consider yourself warned.
Is it worth it?
Is Krakow really worth your visit? Let me tell you something – read my list before you buy your ticket, my friend.
1. It’s too old
Main Market Square – too old and unimpressive
First of all: old streets, old buildings – it’s just all so old! Can’t they be a little more modern? The Main Market Square is from 13th century! Come on, it’s time to renovate some stuff!
2. It’s too boring
There is nothing exciting do do in Krakow
(source: krakow.wyborcza.pl)
There is hardly anything to do in Krakow. Festivals, concerts, celebrations – yada yada. Nothing exciting as such in 2018…
3. There is nothing unique about Krakow
Wawel is not more than ordinary
I wish there was something unique and special about Krakow… Such a shame there is nothing like that…
4. The food is fattening
Pierogi are sooo good. But they are not diet-friendly
Don’t go to Krakow if you are on a diet!
Gosh, the food there will ruin all your efforts to keep slim. It is delicious and awesome restaurant can be spotted at every corner, and all the pierogi can make you so… happy…
5. Kazimierz is so spooky
This is Alchemia bar – isn’t it a little spooky?
(source: weekend.gazeta.pl)
Everyone says that the former Jewish District is so special. And it is, don’t get me wrong. But! Did you know how spooky it is? All those weird cafes and bars can make you feel like you are in a different era.
And there is no quiet moment there – the party goes on and on and on.
6. Bugle call disturbs you every hour!
Bugle call is sooo annoying
You are walking around Main Market Square and literally every hour you have to look up the St. Mary’s Church tower because of the bugle call. Your neck can hurt after a while! It’s so uncomfortable!
7. Your legs will hurt after all this walking
Sure, you want to have a picture of everything but walking that much is so tiring
I mean, how much can you walk? It’s tiring!
8. It’s loud all the time
Musicians are everywhere!
(source: curiouselines.com)
All those street musicians and concerts – they just never stop! I guess it’s beautiful and it creates an awesome atmosphere but people want some silence for the love of God! Right?
9. Salt Mine is too…low
Boooring
Everyone is so excited to visit Wieliczka Salt Mine. C’mon – it’s just a fabulous underground labyrinth of corridors and chambers, decorated with chandeliers and sculptures all made out of salt. So nothing special there! And it’s too cold there.
10. Nightlife is overwhelming
It’s better to avoid all the bars and pubs – believe me
(source: facebook)
There are too many great bars and clubs to choose from. It’s all very confusing. Not to mention a headache the next morning. I highly discourage you from taking part in party activities.
11. Winter is too cold
Is Krakow a Winter Wonderland? I don’t think so!
Winter is the worst season in Krakow. It’s so ugly out there. Nobody leaves their apartments. There is nothing to do outside.
12. Spring is too…green
Don’t even think about it if you suffer from allergy!
Couples in love everywhere! Walking, sitting on benches, enjoying the warmer weather. Yuck!
The most popular choices
13. Summer is too hot
Relaxing on the grass? it’s the worst!
(source: krakow.pl)
The sun shines so brightly. Everyone is so bored. I guess you can just lie on the grass and enjoy doing nothing, but I don’t think there is anyone who would like that.
14. Fall is gloomy and depressing
Aren’t you depressed when you look at it?
It rains all the time. Dark sky. Who would ever want to visit Krakow at this time of the year? Right – nobody!
15. Krakow is the city with no history
Interior of Schindler’s Factory Museum – I guess there is a little history there...
There is nothing that much interesting about Krakow’s history. Medieval times, two World Wars, all the incursions – sure. But I am talking about something REALLY interesting.
There is no history in Krakow.
16. Krakow is the city with no tradition
What can Krakow offer in terms of tradition? All the celebrations? Traditional Krakow clothes? Traditional Krakow dance?
It’s all ridiculous.
17. It’s such a sad city
So sad… Main Market Square is so lifeless…
No color, no happiness. It’s so depressing. Is visiting Krakow really such a good idea?
18. There is nothing breathtaking about it
I couldn’t care less for this beautiful sunset
Is there something that can sweep you off your feet? Like a beautiful building? Or a stunning sunset over Wawel Castle?
Meh…
19. Basically, there is no nature in Krakow
Park Strzelecki in Krakow
You can look for a green spot in Krakow – you will probably not find any! So don’t waste your time.
20. Post-Communist architecture is so…
Nowa Huta from bird’s eye view
…post-communist! How can people live there? It’s such a sad and ugly place!
21. The Wawel Castle is rather average
Wawel Castle – do you even like it?
Yes, it’s nice. And majestic, and huge, and old. But I’ve seen better.
Have you?
Probably the person designing it in the 11th century did not even try that hard.
22. The city is mediocre, to say the most
Main Market Square: It’s not even that good
Just a city like any other. Nothing special about it. Not impressive whatsoever.
23. Vodka tastes awful
Krakow Bar called 'Wódka' – go there if you want to taste this awfulness
Have you ever tried it? It’s so unpleasant!
24. There is nothing to do actively
Look at those people! They are hating it!
Plain walking can get very boring. It’s not like you can bike all over the city. Or use a Segway, or rollerblades, or scooter. Nothing!
25. Meeting awesome people?
They clearly hate each others company as well
Ain’t nobody has time for that!
Don’t even bother to visit Krakow
As you can see – Krakow is a very unimpressive city with no history or tradition whatsoever.
So I do not recommend visiting it. Just stay at home, watch some Netflix and chill.
Travelling is overrated anyway – barely anyone does that anymore!
What do you think about the idea of visiting Krakow?
Are you still going to do that despite my best efforts to discourage you?
